She had run me abath, which sounded good to me. As I soaked in the tub Lauren brought medrinks and let me relax. When she came back in carrying more drinks Ilooked at her with imploring eyes. "Lauren so long as you realise I mightnot be able to do this, OK."She looked back at me with a smile. "Baby you are going to be awesome. Ihave picked out your outfit and you are going to have guys drooling overyou."It hit me like a hammer hitting an anvil. I felt like I had been slappedin the face with a cold wet fish. It was those words that scared me, Ihadn't even thought about that aspect of this. Guys! Shit what if a guydid come onto me?Lauren left me in the tub and started to get dressed herself, I guessthis time she wasn't going to leave getting ready herself in case Ichickened out again. She didn't think it through very well though becauseher words of wisdom about guys had my blood pressure boiling and I wasalready nervous.Lauren came in with another drink and as I laid back sipping my. I tense up when things get real. I build the walls up around me even thicker. I don’t admit feelings, I deny their existence. I don’t fall in love because I don’t want to feel the pain of being hurt. Six months is a long fucking time for me.He’s my Dom, my Daddy, my Sir, my boyfriend and my rock. He’s allowed me to feel and be me. He doesn’t judge me for my faults. He loves me for them. He’s been the first person to breakdown my wall…hell he shattered it.As many of you already know, I am in a triad. The Giant’s other sub/girlfriend (la la) and I have really been able to bond and connect. The dynamics of my relationship with her are complicated. I am submissive to her…but I am not her sub. There’s sexual attraction and energy between us and she and I play quite well with each other and with Him. See? Complicated is good. But, because of an insane workload, I have not gotten to spend much time with her and we really haven’t been able to work out a group night with the 3 of us.She ended.
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